This really isn't a request for thoughts, or prayers. I just need somewhere to vent. I really didn't know where else to put it, so...Here it is.
Today, after 5 years of marriage, my wife left with our 3 and 6 year old daughters. It has been something we knew was inevitable, but the true shock came to me when she decided to pack everything and move 65 miles away. We have tried to remain cordial with one another as talks of divorce progressed.
Tonight though, I had to drive away and watch my two daughters waving goodbye through the rear view mirror. It has been a little over two hours and I have not been able to control the emotions that this has brought up.
Although I can see them whenever I please, it is not nearly enough. Not after all these years of having them here, in our house. I came home and it is so empty. I miss the sound of them running through the house. I even miss their constant bickering. I feel like a hole has been drilled through me and nothing but an hollow shell exists.
I assume time will make this more tolerable, but for now, I have never felt more devastated.
I have been there for every memorable point in there life, always volunteered at their schools and been a proactive father in all aspects of their lives. Despite this, the court feels that the girls would do better with mom (who is a good mother) who has moved in with her parents and sister in a small house in another county. They could have stayed here, living in the only house they have ever known and in the pre-school and school where all of their friends are.
I have never been an overly religious person. In fact, I have so many more questions than any priest, cleric, or minister has ever been able to answer. For the past several months I have prayed intently though. Wanting to believe....Hoping.
Maybe I just didn't do it right.....
Tomorrow is another day. I just hope it is better than today.
Today, after 5 years of marriage, my wife left with our 3 and 6 year old daughters. It has been something we knew was inevitable, but the true shock came to me when she decided to pack everything and move 65 miles away. We have tried to remain cordial with one another as talks of divorce progressed.
Tonight though, I had to drive away and watch my two daughters waving goodbye through the rear view mirror. It has been a little over two hours and I have not been able to control the emotions that this has brought up.
Although I can see them whenever I please, it is not nearly enough. Not after all these years of having them here, in our house. I came home and it is so empty. I miss the sound of them running through the house. I even miss their constant bickering. I feel like a hole has been drilled through me and nothing but an hollow shell exists.
I assume time will make this more tolerable, but for now, I have never felt more devastated.
I have been there for every memorable point in there life, always volunteered at their schools and been a proactive father in all aspects of their lives. Despite this, the court feels that the girls would do better with mom (who is a good mother) who has moved in with her parents and sister in a small house in another county. They could have stayed here, living in the only house they have ever known and in the pre-school and school where all of their friends are.
I have never been an overly religious person. In fact, I have so many more questions than any priest, cleric, or minister has ever been able to answer. For the past several months I have prayed intently though. Wanting to believe....Hoping.
Maybe I just didn't do it right.....
Tomorrow is another day. I just hope it is better than today.